Thank God For Hot Old Ladies

Being the double X chromosomed member of the Free Pizza and Open Bar enterprise, one may think I am not as qualified as Open Bar to discuss this week's topic. However, I believe that all Internet journalists must occasionally broaden horizons. Also, can't a girl have some ladycrushes?

Before I begin, here are some topics I considered for this week:
-Thank God For Botox
-Thank God For Hair Dye/Hair Weaves
-Thank God For Push-Up Bras
-Thank God For Fabulous Shawls

These are all mere stray raindrops falling under the umbrella of Hot Old Ladies. Generally I'm all for allowing oneself to grow old, gracefully letting your youth and beauty slip away...

No-ho-ho...not these bitches.

Cloris Leachman

Hot.

Helen Mirren

Hot.

Lee Meriweather

Hot.

Rue McClanahan

Hot.

Joan Collins

...will throw a cocktail in your face if you even question her hotness.

However, the real reason for this post was to showcase the late and lovely Bea Arthur...

...who will continue to be just as hot and fabulous in the afterlife. We'll miss you, Bea.

You see, not only are hot old ladies here to remind us aging is a beautiful process, but to remind us that after 50, us mortals can never look as hot as these broads.

Listen up, Open Bar!
We're experienced in the art of "Marry One, Fornicate With One (what, should I have used the actual word when so many academic blogging circles are watching? I'd be crucified.), Kill One." It's time to pick from...let's say Cloris Leachman, Lee Meriweather, and Rue McClanahan. Shoot.

Cocktails and sunhats,
Free Pizza

Ps. Let the record show that Susan Lucci...

...does not count as a hot old lady. She's just as desperate to look perpetually 25 years old as she was for that Emmy.